About ‘Mood Hoovers’ - Here’s Why Negative Friends Are Good Your Well-Being
Personally am hungry for wisdom from others regarding managing middle-aged struggles, for example existential reckonings, diminishing importance, noticing one’s neck resembling a melted timepiece along with a recent enthusiasm regarding sunny relocation programs. Lately, I read Jamie Oliver’s words about hitting fifty in an interview: “Trimming unnecessary clutter is key to enjoying your later years,” he noted. “Spend time with positive individuals. I steer clear of downbeat types – ‘energy vampires’ – and am learning to decline more often.”
Initially, I wondered: isn’t there a tension regarding shunning downbeat folks and mastering refusal? Doesn’t that mean he has to avoid himself? I realize – that’s typical energy vampire talk, and I admit I fit the description. Yet, we gloomy souls like to call ourselves “vibe suckers”. Refrain from using “downer” or “spoil-sport” – these comparisons to everyday gear are insulting; we possess sentiments (though often pessimistic). I’ll accept “downbeat cashmere throw”, at a pinch.
Maybe you belong to this group as well. Do you tend to be the event’s realist rather than its cheerleader? When you give an exhaustive answer to “How are you?”, does the other person slowly retreat? Do you greet “fun” activity suggestions with an expression that makes you look like you’ve swallowed a slug? Can you relate deeply to pessimistic characters; has an intuitive ever described your energy as dull?
Should this ring true, welcome to the club, and it’s fine. Although modern wisdom pushes folks to discard “sapping” companions, I contend we bring substantial worth. It’s likely an energy vampire would have expressed doubts – or shown a grimace – upon hearing about the planned book with a First Nations lead done without input, possibly avoiding much trouble, distress, and disrespect. That level of honest feedback is rare among “upbeat” individuals.
